Friday, August 27, 2004

OK kids, finally its come - this deep boil of a red-hot flash of confusion

Yes, its the way people introduce themselves on things like blogging, ICQ, matchmaking

Its the general UNINTERESTINGNESS of what they choose to say about themselves

For instance, "sport, art, cooking, walking". What????? This is what I would call banal & non-descriptive. But so many insist on it.. solidarity comrades with boringness. Fight for the right to be apathetic

I believe its some general activist thing. These are people who are so incensed with interestingness, that they meet in underground newly-renovated glass walled & polished timber floor rooms with north facing bedrooms overlooking spacious city-views, and decide:
"Right, there is too much of this bike riding & public transport taking" {hear, hear}
"That is why I ask that all 400,000 of you at this meeting to rise in anger, invest in a car & insist on packing the roads bumper to bumper every morning & evening, just to show them" {yes!}
"Also, dont be interesting, be normal" {yes}

At this point all half-a-million people in this stadium filed out, all with a ragey-look on their faces, all scrunched up

Out they flowed onto the street, shouting slogans & throwing their fist in the air
"Get real jobs, please oh just do it, a REAL job" " white CEO males are the most oppressed in society, liberate them by giving them $20million payouts" "demand Reality TV domination" "never look at your issues, just project onto others & die of heart failure in 30 years" "help multinationals sell more goods by supporting advertising, watch TV for the ads & pray to God™ that these companies exist, help them to help themselves by helping landfill"

Seagulls were flying everywhere, pidgeons bolted away from their fish & chips feasts, as the hordes of wrath came tumbling down the streets. Chaos.

But, as usual, there were the anti-social elements, however small, which splintered off & surrounded any person drinking lattés
Here is an exerpt from the heated arguements that ensued. An exclusive right here on TahiniCam™™™™™™™™™™

Protestor: "You elite power-dominating lattesipper, I demand you cede your power & give it to the oppressed like us!"
Beret-wearer: "But I'm on the Dole, I didnt know I had power!"
Protestor: "You do, they told me you do, so therefore you do. Stop influencing the media & creating bias in this world. Its your fault we are apparently-experiencing-global-warming-dont-listen-to-the-eco-fascists-this-climate-change-is normal-where's-Tuvalu?"
Bereter: "But no one listens to me. I hate the taste of coffee. I just came to get a wheatgrass juice, just enough mind-you for it, at this rate, I'll run out of money on Tuesday"
Protestor: "You make a mockery of our government, who is here for the battlers, that is the poor people with 4WDs. Yeah, taking away the only thing that brings joy to their hearts & giving them lefty-greenie-xtremeskateboards!"
Bereter: "But, sorry, I didnt know that I, well I was just lying on my form, I'm sorry!! I'll tell the truth errrr next time"

It was at this point that a police-person who was rather excessive with lipids around his abdominal region, came running up with his rusted frame 1920s bike, with a baton, a whistle & a Lord Kitchener type moustache, broke up this tense arguement, though he did look a bit roley-poley & kept falling over...

Sorry, as usual, I lost track with what I was saying. Oh no, thats right

When I walk out there into the wide world, who is ready to jump up & down for no good reason? No one! "I like walks on the beach, moonlight dinners, sports, beer"
Lets breakt this down:
- walks on the beach. Why not skinny dipping?
- Moonlight dinners. Why not midnight feasts in the nude?
- sports. Watching them, playing them, which ones? - why not handball the Australian way (in a playground with a tennis ball hitting against the squares & getting out the person in Ace position - oh dear, didnt explain that one well...)
- beer. How bloody typical! Activists for zinc-deprevation more like it ....

So, if I was to take someone out like this, they are unlikely to say anything a bit ***weird*** or different, just "lets go & see a movie". No! Why not play on the swings? Or maybe do some gardening together? or go searching for Hard Rubbish? or heckling comedians? or climbing rooves? (see, I spelledt it correctli) or patting mooses on the h-h-horns? or walking a cat around the block? or counting street signs? or licking things?

Who says this in their introduction? Because they dont want to

OFFEND

anyone

WELL, Ive got knews from them. I'm offended!

{"Oh no, I new I would offend someone by putting something & I did, oh dear, better not do anything in case someone gets angry. Its a catch-22!"}

THIS HAS BEEN ANOTHER PRESENTATION OF ERICFROGKNEWS

Ah yes, I like ducks. wa!

1 Comments:

At 12 October 2005 at 8:59 pm, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Nice job on your blog! I am book marking your site for future reference.

I have recently created a gardening tool
site/blog. It pretty much covers gardening tool related stuff.

Stop by and check it out if you have time.

 

Post a Comment

<< Home